I open my mouth and words fail me,
I try being strong and tears stream,
I stand up tall, only to feel dizzy,
Smile, I’ve noticeably lost its beam.
I am okay, just a little cold in here,
Excuses and things to cover up,
No I don’t feel it, I don’t feel fear,
I try hard to stay away from the cup.
I need something to numb me down,
It was easier before to light up the cig',
I wish I could sprint the town,
Buried in water far from any rig.
Could I decide never to speak again?
Could I ignore and go about life?
Yes, I have strength even with pain.
Won’t talk even if you hold a knife.
No more talk I am done talking,
No one to know what is inside,
Stable, yet my insides knocking,
I know all I can do is to hide.
